Eat Your Greens

So I've been kinda lax on posting to chipweb lately because I've been trying to be healthy. Although you can't get more back-to-basics and salt of the earth than a potato (it's a historical vegetable!), they were really doing a number on my jeans, as in the number of my jeans i couldn't fit into. So imagine what a breath of salty air it was to see Green Bean chips at Trader Joe's the other day. It's a vegetable! It's a protein! Green! Salty! It's like freeze-drying Enid's spicy green beans! I'm just trying to say that it's worth the wait in line at the Union Sq Trader Joe's.

Next up- interview with a real live chip factory GM!

I've got the MUNCHIES

Say hello to the Munchies, the Hostess Mascotts of the 80's & 90's! These little stoners were so cute with their thick black eyebrows and furry bums. If you saved enough POP's (proof of purchase code bars), you could send them to Hostess and redeem them for dolls! They're slogan was "Cause when you got the munchies, nothing else will do!". They really catered to the stoners and stoners in training.

QUANTITY CONTROL!!!

When I was 10 I was ADDICTED to Hostess Hickory Sticks. They don't carry this brand in the USA and similar products made in the states are just not the same. Like a pomegranate, they are hard to eat, so tiny and fall through your fingers. But like green seedless grapes and popcorn, they are rewarding and there is little hope of stopping once in front of you. If you eat these, I would use my mother's method called "QUANTITY CONTROL! QUANTITY CONTROL!!!", where she would run around the house and scream this to all the kids and cousins to make sure even the little ones got their share.

Stoned w/ Dill Pickles in Canada

Humpty Dumpty Chips is a Canadian classic! First note, how STONED the Humpty Dumpty guy is! He can barely lift his eyelids! Then note the food coma he is in from all the tasty chips. You can't get this flavor in the states, so I had to smuggle two large bags across the border from my Toronto trip.

Got no friends in Pennsylvania

I was very excited to see Good's potato chips for sale at None Such Farms, in Doylestown, PA. The packaging is, as crudely evidenced in the above photo, wonderful. The chips, surprisingly, are NOT. They aren't bad, though, either. It remains a mystery as to whether they are kettle-cooked. The story on the back of the bag tells of how they still use their "time-tested handle kettle operation" though the crunch of the chip tells another story. This raises a dumb, but necessary question: if a chip isn't cooked in a kettle, in what exactly is it cooked? A giant vat? I have no idea, but I'm learning as I go; I guess as I chomp. Anyway, the immediate reaction to the Good's was these chips are NOT good, but as you find yourself eating more and more, it turns into a "not bad." The day after initially opening the bag, I ate another chip and thought, "this tastes like bacon." I checked the ingredient list and sure enough the chips are cooked in LARD! With no apology, or allusion to the fact that these chips are in fact not vegetarian! Total respect - I'm sorry, that is bad ass - especially in these calorie-counting times. McDonald's stopped cooking their fries in beef tallow in like 1992, so for a taste of the old times, get the Good's!!

Mac trux in the Poconos...

Does Pennsylvania's soil offer something unique for the planting of potatoes? I imagine a time when, maybe during and after the war, every state in this vast land had more potato chip businesses than one could ever hope to tally. A half century ago, I would reason that a trip to any new state would afford plenty of new and exciting, local chips. So I'm left wondering why Pennsylvania (and to a lesser degree, Ohio) houses so many lil chip companies, and how they remain in business. Why haven't the national brands killed the little guys here? It warms my heart! Others should take note! That said, I'm beginning to see a trend: Wonderful, heart-melting, classic, timeless, packaging but a MEDIOCRE CHIP! If I'd grown up with any of these chips, I would wholeheartedly sing their praises and claim them to be the best chip the world's ever birthed, but in the interest of objectivity, and building the credibility of Chipweb, I must be fair in my assessment of these chips. I tried Martin's "Kettle-Cook'd Hand Cooked Potato Chips" and they were NOT GOOD!!! Some hypothesized that it was the oil in which the chips were cooked that made for the disappointment. Maybe. It is listed as Vegetable Shortening, which doesn't have the same appeal as Sunflower Oil, etc. But maybe that is naive? Most bad chips taste the same; they taste synthetic, they taste like those Potato Stix that come in a can. The kettle crunch was not up there with other chips I've had, and the taste was just bad. I wanted to like these chips so much and I'm sad to give my honest report. Visit their website and support them just the same: www.martinschips.com. More PA chips to come!

i will trade my first born...

...for a bag of these....




"Sabritones brand is the traditional puffed wheat snack from Mexico that combines the authentic flavors of spicy chile with tangy lime."

I ate these for breakfast, lunch and dinner when i went to Mexico. According to the Frito-Lay product finder, the only place I can find my precious Sabritones is Moultrie, GA or duh, Mexico. Should anyone come across a bag....you will be greatly rewarded.

Soon the desert will be gone!!!

Poore Brothers Potato Chips are based in Arizona, and available in California and the Southwest. They get it right! The packaging is bad, but the kettle-cooked crunch is spot on, as is the flavoring. I tried Desert Mesquite Bar-B-Que and they were mostly wonderful. (What the hell is mesquite?) Not overwhelmingly “bold” (though they boast as much), with a satisfying garlic, and onion flavoring, the chips are a success. They have a range of flavorings, and I’m curious to try their Parmesan & Garlic chip!



















I don’t speak Spanish and it’s the worst! But I can still eat their chips! Toreadas are hecho en Mexico, and they RULE MY LIFE! They remain impossibly light while retaining a kettle-cooked crunch and the Habanero makes them addictive. The flavoring is subtle but intense. And it’s not simply a let’s get it as hot as possible type thing, you really do taste the sweet/hot contradiction of the Habanero. As the back of the bag says, celebrate the chiles!!!



















Let’s be real. Like it or not, these days when you eat a flavored tortilla chip, you’re going to be measuring how it stacks up to the original Doritos chip. Most are either inferior imitations or fancy impostors trying to better the quality of the product while not understanding it’s in part the phoniness of the Dorito which makes it transcendent in the first place. El Sabroso’s Jalapenitos get everything right. An all natural – no msg – and stone ground corn chip, packing a hat trick of Manchego, Cotija, and Asadero cheeses, and blended with fire-roasted jalapenos make these the perfect combo of high and low brow chip. The flavoring doesn’t overwhelm the corn, allowing all the flavors to shine. These chips are made by the mysterious Snak King (“King of Snacks”) based in Los Angeles. Let’s get lost in his castle!

pacific northwest addendum

The aforementioned Tim’s Cascade Chips has a line called Hawaiian, and the flavor is called out as Sweet Maui Onion. The previous Tim’s chips were delicious and these were even more special. The chips are maybe sliced thinner than your normal kettle-cooked, making the satisfaction of the crunch even more fleeting; more dramatic. The flavoring is extremely mild, they might pass visually as an unflavored chip, but there’s a wonderful sweetness to be found therein, and the salt comes off on your fingers so you’re left licking it off til you realize you can’t remember the last time you washed your hands. They are literally finger lickin’ good ya’ll! Also, the bag features some ridiculous-looking native Hawaiian homos in a canoe.